Once again, I’m reminded of the mixed blessing of getting what you asked for. The other day, I spent some time looking back at some of my old posts, ones I wrote before publication of my novel. I was so upbeat then. My posts reflected optimism for my future as an author. I let the “baggage” that came with publication murder that.Once again, I’m reminded of the mixed blessing of getting what you asked for. The other day, I spent some time looking back at some of my old posts, ones I wrote before publication of my novel. I was so upbeat then. My posts reflected optimism for my future as an author. I let the “baggage” that came with publication murder that.
I don’t like this gloomy person I’ve become. More than once lately, I’ve read a blog post written by a hopeful writer, and found myself sneering with cynicism. At least I had enough sense not to leave a comment revealing my negative opinion.
What changed me from a champion of writers to a cynic? In short—business. I bemoaned the necessity of adding book publicist to my role as writer, but what I actually did was replace one for the other. Big mistake!
After reading those old posts, there’s no question in my mind that I much prefer the writer me. I’m happy writing. It’s a great adventure. Oh sure, about every other day, I wailed that my writing was garbage, but I never really believed that because I had hope. I could learn. I could fix my mistakes. I could become the writer I wanted to be.
Then, I had to promote my writing. I suck at that. Really, truly, I do. And because I fail so miserably at it, my brain mixed up my view of myself as a marketer/publicist with my view of myself as a writer. I transformed into one ginormous Grumpy Bear that fails at promotion and never writes.
So, here’s my plan going forward. I will allow myself only one hour a week for the business side of publication. The rest of my time will be spent having fun—which mostly means writing, but also catching up on a couple other things I’ve put off for too long. Maybe I’ll even have time to play online again.
Promotion is a necessary evil, but only if I have a book to sell. If I don’t recapture that optimism, that glorious dream, I’m afraid I’ll give up writing completely … and that would be giving up on me.
Care Bears are copyrighted by American Greetings Corporation, Inc.
Concentrating on writing, doing what feels right and is happy-making seems to me to make a lot of sense and be the most important foci in life, so I’m glad you’re heading back that way.
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Oh, Natasha, I know you’ve said this to me before, probably more than once. 😉 I appreciate your continued effort to spur me on. I just keep getting sucked backward into the muck again. Maybe this time …
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You are not alone! We all suck at wearing all those other hats that indie authors have to wear…marketing, press, agent, editor, salesman, and the like. And wearing those hats takes us away from the one we enjoy wearing the most, the one that fits us so perfectly and is the reason we wrote the damn book in the first place – the writer!
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Do we all, Shannon? Well, obviously not indies like John Locke, huh? But thank you for letting me know I’m not alone. 🙂
I need to program myself to have Today, I write! as my first thought every morning. Lately, my thought has been more along the lines of How can I get someone to read my book today?”
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Linda, I relate to this post so much! I think part of why I feel like I suck at promotion is because I’m not really sure what qualifies as promotion or what works in that arena. I keep thinking about what Joe Sez: Just keep writing. Write the next book, the next story, etc. Those authors who really become successful seem to be folks who Just. Keep. Writing.
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I know this, Amy, yet I’m not doing it. *sigh* I think I need someone to slap me everyday to remind me what’s most important. 😉
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That way you can become Sunshine Bear.
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I used to be Sunshine Bear, Lara. 🙂 Fall is a good time to for a change. Let’s see what I can do.
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Press on!
MJ
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Thank you, Mary Jean. 🙂
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